The Distance Between 'We' and 'They'

Typical playground time..

My first contact to foreign human who doesn't speak my mother language and have different appearance happened at my age 6. It was during dried and cold late fall. I was left with my grandmother while waiting for my mom till she finished work as always. Grandma was typically catching up and spending enjoyable time with her friends and neighbors at a villege center; I was usually playing in an empty playground. I was usually alone, if there's any children, we became amazing friends and played together as if we'd known one another for a long time although we barely saw again after the first time of meeting. And one day, a little girl who seemed to be around my age with big eyes and a little bit darker skin was there, nearby me in the same playground. I now think some residential area was occupied by foreign labours in my hood since my hometown was very well known for vessel and car manufacture industry.

Conversation with 'them'

I approached to her playing alone crouched down with shy smile on my face, then we naturally started drawing numbers on the sand with our fingers. Yes, we were communicating completely with eyes and faces.. 'do you know 1? 2?', 'do you use the same numbers at where you are from?', 'wow it's cool! I know 3 too!', those kind of silent kid's conversations. We smiled happily because we felt we were connected and clicked right away as friends like how I normally made friends at playgrounds. We made sand-mole tunnels and had swings together. Interestingly, we didn't even try speaking in any languages because we maybe knew we were different but same. Without a word or a sound from our mouths in communication method, we constantly laughed and we silently waved our hand when her mom came to pick her up as the temperature went down with light got darker after sunset. When I ran to the playground next time expecting to see interesting exotic friend again, I couldn't see her any longer. She was my first foreign friend I of age 6 made and I missed.

Having resistance of a lizard

Speaking of contact with 'they', feeling of resistance to something is very natural and has diverse dimensions and levels of how one reacts. When I was travelling Delhi, India, I had to encounter many awkward and goose-bumping moments that lizards or rats accidentally crossed my zone - it's not 'my' zone (I might be in 'their' zone) but I only hoped they never showed up in my living area. Some people may consider lizards cute reptile, but my system of perception and reaction-formula automatically works with negative expression to them. One cozy and peaceful day, I found it's simply because we were different and he had some parts I didn't get comfortable with for instance, his long tail and the texture of skin, and interestingly I saw he was shocked and embarrassed when he found me. The baby lizard couldn't even move for his fear toward me. I think it applies on among humans too. We pretend we are okay - sometimes strong rejective feelings disturb us to pretend calm and neutral- , however, so many feelings and thoughts must come up naturally while we are with different people regardless and regard of ethnicities, sex, religion, and ages. The point is not comprehension of natural negative feelings keeping distance to certain things and persons and rationalize it; but, practices and training oneself of human manners with trustworthy realization of unity and connection with others.

Australopithecus brothers and sisters

In evolutionary theories, there are so many different evidences and debatable arguments, yet the clear consensus of them is 'connection'. We have genes within us that were from the fishes, Australopithecus, and Black African humans and more. We sometimes oversee how similar we are; we all want to belong to certain community, to be alive, healthy and happy which are associated with human fundamental rights carrying justice, equality and basic quality of living. We get sad, excited, disappointed, jealous, grateful, honored, motivated, lazy, and dumb.. just we have delicately different own formula of perceptions and levels of reaction on thinking process. To deny and hate others may indicate denial of oneself at certain points.

#racism #culture #people #connection

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